The Spies
Did you know there was an animated movie about a spy that becomes a pigeon? I have seen the trailers. I haven't watched the movie. I hope I get to watch it soon. (Have been on an Office marathon - dear God that series is so phenomenal, I feel like I have been living under a rock all this time. Why can't all comedy series/shows have no laughter track? It's so refreshing and you actually feel so invested in the show. The jokes I found funny had me giggling for DAYS)
Anyway, this isn't going to be a long adoration of The Office (Although I do wish I do that as well. Maybe I will re-watch it and gain better perspective) This is going to be about the spies.
And yes, the movie I was talking about? I am inclined to believe it's true. Look, I grew up here. Pigeons were the weird birds you released when there was some event going on, and even then, you got to see them on TV. About 5 years ago, they began appearing (and crapping) all over our terrace because they had conveniently built a nest there. And I agree, that as humans we have encroached their lands and forests and blah-dee-blah. My point is, they were a rarity before. We had many crows and sparrows. One might say, sparrows being little birds were less equipped to deal with the stress of modernization and "progress" (more like helping ourselves die early but hey- who am I to judge?). However crows? I stopped seeing crows! I liked crows and sparrows and other birds.
And then came these disgusting sky-rats. They poop everywhere, they shed their feathers everywhere and are so goddamned numerous. They seem to have replaced every bird that used to be common here. And they are rude. And they have absolutely no fear of human beings at all. Here's a picture of the sky-rats on my terrace, pecking at some grain - which I did NOT give them. It was the lady upstairs who likes them for some reason. Or maybe she is worshiping the aliens who knows
These pigeons were Dodo-like fearless. I mean doesn't every animal (except a dog maybe) first think about it's safety? What gives these creatures the confidence? I walked right up to them, and they just continued pecking, like there was nothing else they would rather do.
Except there is.
Apart from the pecking and pooping and breeding I mean.
If you have pigeons around you, I suggest you take some time and notice them very very closely. You might catch them looking at you with their beady little dumb eyes. (Their eyes are red, that's because they are the spawn of Satan). First you will notice one of them. Then you see three. Slowly, all around you, even on a roof top a kilometer away, you will see a pigeon. And will be looking at you. Not in a way that might say - Hey, it's that two legged creature again, maybe she will give me some food. They stare at you in a way that says - Hey, I am a dumb pigeon look at me! I am not doing anything here, just hanging around and STARING AT YOU, BECAUSE I HAVE TO MAKE REPORTS AND SEND IT TO MY AGENCY AND WE WILL BE MONITORING YOU TILL WE CAN TAKE YOU IN FOR QUESTIONING
I might be wrong. But then again I might be right. (God I love Micheal Scott) Wow, I might have to join the pigeons are spies forums all around the world.
In case you doubt me, I dare you to observe the pigeons around you. And observe their red dim eyes that reflect the guttering flames of hell. In case you think you aren't being followed by pigeons, you are either assigned the super secretive squadron or you are next in line. What do they want? Who are they reporting to? Do they seek world-domination? Will it end in blood shed? We may not know until it is too late.
Until next time,
DragonRider
Anyway, this isn't going to be a long adoration of The Office (Although I do wish I do that as well. Maybe I will re-watch it and gain better perspective) This is going to be about the spies.
And yes, the movie I was talking about? I am inclined to believe it's true. Look, I grew up here. Pigeons were the weird birds you released when there was some event going on, and even then, you got to see them on TV. About 5 years ago, they began appearing (and crapping) all over our terrace because they had conveniently built a nest there. And I agree, that as humans we have encroached their lands and forests and blah-dee-blah. My point is, they were a rarity before. We had many crows and sparrows. One might say, sparrows being little birds were less equipped to deal with the stress of modernization and "progress" (more like helping ourselves die early but hey- who am I to judge?). However crows? I stopped seeing crows! I liked crows and sparrows and other birds.
And then came these disgusting sky-rats. They poop everywhere, they shed their feathers everywhere and are so goddamned numerous. They seem to have replaced every bird that used to be common here. And they are rude. And they have absolutely no fear of human beings at all. Here's a picture of the sky-rats on my terrace, pecking at some grain - which I did NOT give them. It was the lady upstairs who likes them for some reason. Or maybe she is worshiping the aliens who knows
These pigeons were Dodo-like fearless. I mean doesn't every animal (except a dog maybe) first think about it's safety? What gives these creatures the confidence? I walked right up to them, and they just continued pecking, like there was nothing else they would rather do.
Except there is.
Apart from the pecking and pooping and breeding I mean.
If you have pigeons around you, I suggest you take some time and notice them very very closely. You might catch them looking at you with their beady little dumb eyes. (Their eyes are red, that's because they are the spawn of Satan). First you will notice one of them. Then you see three. Slowly, all around you, even on a roof top a kilometer away, you will see a pigeon. And will be looking at you. Not in a way that might say - Hey, it's that two legged creature again, maybe she will give me some food. They stare at you in a way that says - Hey, I am a dumb pigeon look at me! I am not doing anything here, just hanging around and STARING AT YOU, BECAUSE I HAVE TO MAKE REPORTS AND SEND IT TO MY AGENCY AND WE WILL BE MONITORING YOU TILL WE CAN TAKE YOU IN FOR QUESTIONING
I might be wrong. But then again I might be right. (God I love Micheal Scott) Wow, I might have to join the pigeons are spies forums all around the world.
In case you doubt me, I dare you to observe the pigeons around you. And observe their red dim eyes that reflect the guttering flames of hell. In case you think you aren't being followed by pigeons, you are either assigned the super secretive squadron or you are next in line. What do they want? Who are they reporting to? Do they seek world-domination? Will it end in blood shed? We may not know until it is too late.
Until next time,
DragonRider
Comments