A Lame Person's Movie Review: Andhagaaram

 Happy New Year Everyone!!!

I had the most amazing chat with my friends yesterday/today and I suddenly went on a roll describing the media that I watched/read. I realized I wanted to write about them, but was too lazy earlier - so here goes

DISCLAIMER: I dont know movies people. I only write what I understand.

This movie is a WHOPPING 2 hours and 51 minutes long.

It began with a bunch of people who looked the same. There were 4 guys who looked the same (or 3. It's hard to make out). There were two women - one girlfriend and one friend (who again looked the same). There was also a doctor who mercifully looked different.

The doctor is a trauma psychologist who talks people out of trauma. He is angry for some reason. The movie's plot has moving timelines which is probably what makes it a popular movie? (I couldn't even call it an art movie)

The protagonist is a chain-smoker who doesn't own a phone. He does however have a house phone. This causes a lot of problems because he cannot meet his friends on time. He has his own house and everything and is a cricket coach. Noice. 

Anyway, this landline breaks and he gets an old rotating dial phone from the 1990's. I know this because I am old and have used a phone like that. 

He has a friend who was mentally ill due to some spooky book this guy gifted. (I later on realized that the mentally disturbed bloke could be this guy's sister's boyfriend). Protagonist's sister's mentally ill boyfriend kills himself after a visit from the trauma psychologist doctor. Sister is devastated. This guy (protagonist) is guilty , because it was his stolen spooky book that ultimately killed his sister's boyfriend. This guy has broken up with his girlfriend who causes unnecessary drama irrelevant to the film. His friend is disappointed in him. Again unnecessary to the film's plot. The protagonist's sister is a teacher for blind kids. Her favourite student was a child who worked at the library where this guy stole the spooky book from. The sister is very accepting that her student is a ghost now

The kid's backstory is explained in detail. He deals with the occult because he has been blessed with the Sight. He also owns a sweet sweet property that a regular Indian guy wants. (All regular people are creepy and out to suck blood. I wish this was a joke, but i think deep down you know I am right) The Indian gangsta (LOL) decides to forcefully get his thumb impression and ends up killing the kid. The kid is the ghost who haunts the telephone. 

Oh yeah I totally forgot the main plot. The protagonist's new rotating dial landline is haunted, and he gets threats and shit from the telephone. You later on realize that this was the friendly ghost trying to save this dude from the bad ghost - aka the trauma doctor. Why is the doctor dead? The doctor had one patient who killed himself This made the doctor loose his license. Then the protagonist's sister's mentally ill boyfriend is revealed to be possessed by the evil ghost of the patient who committed suicide. Since the patient blamed the doctor he made the protagonist's sister's mentally ill - possessed boyfriend fall out the window - RIGHT ON TOP OF THE DOCTOR. The doctor died and wants his revenge. Who made this guy mentally ill and susceptible to possession? THATS RIGHT - the PROTAGONIST. OOOOHHH DAMN

So now the two ghosts - the ghost of the kid who was killed for his sweet sweet property and the ghost of the doctor fight it out in a battle of complicated Tamil words that I didnt bother to understand. There was a LOT of talking. Finally the kid wins and the phone is sent to the gansta's (LOL) govt office where it then proceeds to kill the gangsta (LOL)

The End