DR**S Are Awesome!!

 Some of you might remember me telling that I had to undergo surgery.

Surgery and doctors in general bring back unpleasant experiences of my childhood, where I was a sickly, emaciated , junk food loving creature that used to get jabbed quite often.

This led to an aversion to needles, blood, medical procedures, the smell of hospitals and doctors in general.

Cut to now, when I have this insane infection on my foot that isn't letting me move, and the useless surgeon (ok I still do not like doctors, so you will see me being really ungrateful here. ) - anyway, the useless surgeon suggested I get it removed. (the skin, not the foot. I  have had this discussion with the Book Club, where D for some reason thought that a rite of passage into 30 - welcome to the @30 club D - involves losing a digit or two. She was sadly quite disappointed when I informed her otherwise). 

That led to me breaking down in the doctors office where I yelled to the universe "They're gonna jab me with needles!"

For some reason the surgeon did not want to wait any longer and asked us to get to the hospital ASAP ( he had to do this because I had already rejected his advice of surgery, and now ended up with multiple localized infections I guess?) So there I was being pushed into the dept where they push a receptacle into your hand that draws and pumps blood. As though that wasn't enough , they then dumped me in a wheelchair and took me to a room while they readied the operation theatre.

And all too soon, it was time to get into the operation theatre. No amount of consoling on anyone's part would suffice yours truly, I was petrified of being anywhere near the creature who wanted to do this to me (aka the surgeon).

He took one look at me, and advised that I be sedated. Couldn't they sedate me before jabbing the ever loving fu-- out of my leg for the local anesthetic ? no of course not. the stupid anesthesiologist decided to look surprised that  I was yelling, and then of course the surgeon was walking in and asking them to sedate me. 

I don't know if the oxygen mask or the receptacle in my arm did the trick but these idiots started asking me about work, and I was looking at the 4 tiles on the ceiling of the OT (operation theatre. Yay look at me being medically familiar with this bull crap) , and soon, I was floating, with no sense of self, and no idea what was going on. 

I remember coming to because I heard someone talking to me. I guess this is the only part I remember, because I was reading Throne of Glass at the time and I remember mumbling to myself about how Aelin retained her sanity under torture and I was telling my self really hard to remember who I was as I moved between the white doors of the worlds and found each one wondrous to look through

And then there was the annoying voice of the anesthesiologist who decided he needed to talk to me about mundane things, and I remember wanting to explore more worlds so I started asking him if he reads about 50 times. He replied to no each time. Then he asked me what did I read, and I remember him telling me he reads Chetan Bhagat. I might have judged him to his face, it is hard to say. 

He kept asking me if I was conscious because he really wanted to get out of the OT, but there was no way my body , that he painfully jabbed, would be ok to see him happy ever again.

Finally I was wheeled out with a humungous bandage on my feet, and the surgeon was outside telling my family that the operation went well, aided by the fact that I was not awake for most of it. And of course as I'm being wheeled out, I decide to announce to my poor husband that Drugs are awesome, and privately imagining how nice it would be to stay there. My father was rightfully mortified as I immediately launched into a retelling of my drug fueled adventures in great detail, and I could see the worried glances the other doctors gave to each other as I extolled the virtues of being put under.

Then of course they kept pumping me with Saline to get rid of all this stuff, which is a load of crap if you ask me, and only let me go the next day once they were sure I wasn't going to run off into the sunset screaming about the goodness of not having to face reality for a few hours. 

I guess the bottom-line here is that drugs are bad, but goddamn are they awesome.

Until next time 

DragonRider