Weddings!!!

Hi!

As some of you know, I went to attend a wedding recently !! It was of a distant cousin's (so I don't really know her. At all), and that's why it was fun! 

It was in Chennai (and by the end of March, so Chennai wasn't a furnace yet). I would like to tell you about the experience as a whole. And also list out the set of rituals that are performed to get two people married. And about how much I ate there :P (Let's face it. This is what we go for. This is what we live for). 

All the prep started about two weeks ago, when I started whining about the long weekend and how we hadn't been anywhere in a long time. I guess it wasn't what I (or my mom) was expecting, when my dad came up with the brilliant idea of going to this wedding. After the initial resistance towards the idea, my mom agreed (why is a question she still asks herself). And once the majority in my house agrees, it's only a matter of time before I must bow my head too.

Planning began! In the next two hours we booked tickets. By that evening, my inspired mother dragged us along to Commercial Street - the go to destination for wedding wear! I bought one expensive dress, and jewelry to match. This was going to be the showstopper for the reception. The one for the wedding wasn't found. (Did we really have to attend both events you ask? We did too. But my dad got all sulky and mad at us for asking such blasphemous questions. So we just went along with whatever he said. )

Everything was set. My friend who was desperately counting on me for our special vacation was informed (sorry P. Although not really sorry for all the teasing that followed). Permissions to take two days off obtained! The Monday of the vacay week dawned upon us. And I had a cold.
It's funny how colds decide to make an appearance just when you have something important coming up. Upon consulting with almost all the people I know, it was decided that I take pills to quickly suppress the useless thing. Pills were also taken!

The morning dawned, and my parents weren't able to sleep. (I snored away happily). The train was supposed to start at 6.30 from Majestic, and here we were, rushing out with our large bags to catch it. Thankfully we reached on time, and settled down. I rushed to the window :p The journey was pretty uneventful (apart from being unbearable hot and sticky and smelly). Turns out my niece and nephew were also on the same train, so we all reached the mantapa directly. And there, my usual strategy of nodding my head politely and pretending to understand tamil (Tamizh for all you nazis out there) came handy. Turns out all the rooms there were occupied because the guy's folks had taken them all. So we were put up in rooms away from the marriage hall. (Not that I am complaining).

By the way, this is where the food began :D

So first we had this absolutely delicious lunch. Now some of you might like fancy stuff like fried rice- but in places like this, the local fare is highly recommended. The traditional bhakshanam found in South Indian (Tam Brahm) wedding halls is absolutely divine and mustn't be missed. Did you know there could be payasam  made of tender coconuts? It was so cool, and perfect that no "natural icecream" could ever come even a millimeter close to it. I for one have decided to forego any tender coconut artificial stuff from now on. I can't even list out all the wondrous things I got to eat that afternoon - you will just have to take my word for it.

Then came the reception. After struggling for a couple of minutes to fit my large ugly head into my dress (I just couldn't do it justice), we were ready for our next take on food. But first a couple of words on the stars of the day! (Who I hadn't met till date. Or even seen) The bride and groom entered slowly into the wedding hall. (I swear most of us stopped breathing for sometime. The bride looked drop dead gorgeous). I was pretty surprised, because she was quite tall, and had features not found in our side of the family. She looked very regal, but friendly at the same time. (I don't know how she managed that. i would probably waddle like a duck and squawk if dressed that way). Anyway, once they reached the place where they take photographs, everyone could be heard gossiping about the girl, the guy, their whole families (the usual blah blah blah that maamis are well known for). There was a group which performed music, and I must say, although I do not know much about carnatic music, they played extremely well, and had quite a few fans throughout the evening. I have a couple pictures, do let me know if you want them, in case you recognize anyone !

The hall had options for paani puri, bhel, cotton candy stalls, popcorn (I do not understand the logic behind this, but it kept the kids super happy and occupied), unlimited ice cream (of which I couldn't try any due to my useless throat), and some food items which are easily forgettable now. I guess that's because they didn't have the feel of the scrumptious goodness of the traditional fare I expected. (Ok, I agree that I went there to shamelessly eat stuff). By this time I was pretty much stuffed, so much so that I couldn't sleep and we were supposed to attend come back by 7 am for the main event (aka the wedding) .

These days, our weddings usually have some or the other inclusion from different regions of our country, (sometimes even the world). Not so here. this was a proper Tam-brahm wedding. I will list out the various rituals and procedures in a series of steps. This is what I took away from the experience so I apologize in advance if there is something I missed, or misinterpreted. Feel free to correct me!!

1. First the guy ends up at the girl's house (for the purpose of getting married) . He is invited inside, and kajal is applied on his eyes and cheek, to remove all bad influences. Then the girl's mother will feed him some traditional food items. (This is to signify that the boy has come for the first time to see the girl). 
2. Then the guy decides that he is done with the mortal needs of this world, and that he cannot give in to maya , and decides he will take up sanyas and sets off on a Kasi Yatra. He get's a fancy umbrella, a walking stick and a small vessel to hold holy water in, (This is to signify that he is too cool for the likes of this world - I guess. I don't know. Perhaps this custom came since the people getting married those days were teenagers, who had to be seen as cool. )
3. The girl's father runs out of the house, (the boy had come out of the building onto the road by then) and stops the boy from going, begging him to marry his daughter. (Can I just say ewwwrrghghgh here?) Then after some convincing the guy says fine. So the girl is brought out , and they both exchange flower garlands that the other was wearing. (Why would anyone sane walk around with garlands of flowers about their necks everyday beats me). This is a good opportunity for the guy's side and the girl's side to have some fun, as each family tries to lift up their respective candidate higher up into the air, and who bows to get the garland first competition begins. It is said that, if the girl manages to garland the boy, then she would steer the relationship. (yay. I guess)
4. Then the boy holds the girl's hand in some fancy posture and takes her in, to get married. 
5. Here, the girl's side of the family give gifts of food, gold, clothing, to the boy's side. Then the girl sit's on her father's lap for the last time in her life, signifying the end of her childhood and her entry into the only responsible member of her new relationship... (or as the oldies love to call it, the beginning of her real life or some crap like that) . Money, a coconut, and beetle leaves are drenched in milk and handed over to the girl, who gives it to the guy. 
6. Then still sitting on her father's lap, the rope that ties her to this guy is tied tight. The boy's sisters help him out (these folks had a lot of kids those days. You were guaranteed to have a lot of siblings). The girl's family hands over more gold and clothing to all the sisters who helped tie the knot. 
7. Then a new dress is given to the girl by the mother-in-law, signifying her belonging to the new family, and she must go change into her new clothes. Finally, a silver toe ring is given to her by her husband with the promise that he will be by her side in times of trouble. (Ha, ha, ha)
8. Then from the guy's side customary poojas are performed and that's the end of things. 

My dad tells me that the actual wedding ends the Kasi Yatra . So I guess, this is the super quick version of what happens. I will keep editing to add more details as I remember or ask my mom. I write this so that, I don't have to attend long and boring weddings again. (I hope you are reading this Dad. Seriously, it isn't cool to make us sit in the hall till the whole married lot leaves. We almost died of boredom). 

It's pretty late now. I can't believe tomorrow is a weekday. *Sigh*

Until next time!

DragonRider